Aimercat (aimercat) wrote,

The Missing Stair aka How Amy soiled Xmas 1978.

I'll be honest, I'm prone to dumb blonde moments. It happens. At my thrival job, I'll minority screw someone's order up or forget to get them a napkin or a water...again, something minor, but I'll still defuse the situation with something like "by the way, I'm not so bright, I dropped myself on my own head as a child" and many times, they'll laugh and then ask how it is possible to drop oneself on one's own head. I have been known to defy science. therefore, it's possible for me and it involves a missing stair.

It's Xmas 1978 (yes I'm dating myself), I'm 5 years old and we are leaving my grandparents house after a day of holiday excitement, present opening, dinner (at the kid's table for me of course) and birthday fun for my dad (yes, his bday was on about screwed...oh wait, double screwing because not only did he share his birthday with The Baby Jesus, but he also shared it with HIS TWIN!). I decided hopping down my grandparents' front porch steps one by one is a great idea. Sure enough on the last step, I miss & hit a patch of ice instead which sends me flying and I hit the back of my head on the concrete step. This is me throwing myself on my own head.

Merry Christmas family, Happy Birthday dad, hope a trip to the emergency room was on your wish list because that's what I gift wrapped and got you as a present! Such a frugal 5-year old I was....I didn't pay a dime for that present....i was crafting my gifts even back then.

Thus how a missing stair has become my go-to excuse for minor brain farts ever since.

And now....if you want the movie version of this story (or you're just too lazy to read), I made a video as well.

It's unlisted on my Youtube page so if you're having problems viewing it from here, click on this link instead.
Tags: childhood, family, holidays, ljidol, ohio
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