?

Log in

No account? Create an account

Previous Entry | Next Entry

Livebloggin "A Christmas Story"

Yes, I've never seen "A Christmas Story". I know blasphemy considering that I live in Ohio & proclaim to be the Queen of Ohio & the house is like 10 minutes from where my beloved Indians play. Therefore, I've been given the task by my boyfriend to not only watch "A Christmas Story" but also have a full report on his desk by morning. Hope livebloggin will suffice because that's how I roll, baby!

I got snacks & drinks by the tv and I'm ready to go.

-Wooo hoo! Cleveland Street....in Cleveland Ohio!
-oh look, downtown Cleveland!
-man this Ralphie kid looks like a total mouthbreather.
-no everyone doesn't know that, i didn't know the lone ranger's nephew's horse was named Victor.
-northern Indiana, my ass....that's Cleveland. stop trying to steal the Buckeye state's glory.
-nah, he won't shoot his eye out. He has those coke-bottle glasses to save him.
-eff that! there's starving people in Cleveland. forget China!
-this kid is a horrid aim...all he can do is hit people in the ass. No way in hell he's going to shoot his eye out. maybe a butt cheek.
-someone explain to me why they bundle the 1 kid up but not Ralphie.
-man, i got my mouth stuck on a door handle once as a kid cuz i thought i could open it with my teeth. Yep...that shit hurt. flagpole kid...i feel your pain.
-holy shit...that scary kid with the raccoon hat looks like a long lost Weasly family member from Harry Potter.
-wow...are you SURE this movie isn't set in Ohio? My hillbilly next door neighbors when I was growing up had 785 smelly dogs too....including a retarded blind/deaf one that was born with like 2 noses. That thing scared the shit out of me. it was like a freak show. they also had like 600 cats, 499 chickens and a goat.
-uh oh....now all the Arabs are going to get pissed about that line of dialogue. Well, we can rest assured that this movie won't get remade....guns, racist remarks, violence against kids, bullying, advocating waterboarding (Chinese water torture), child abuse (putting soap in your kid's mouth)...yep, not getting remade.
-wait...soap in your mouth makes you blind? i thought that was masturbation. Crap! no wonder I needed LASIK!
-man, if i was this Flick kid, I would stop hanging out with this Ralphie dude. first you let him stick his tongue on a pole, then you let him get his ass kicked by the bullies.
-Now I KNOW this movie isn't really Indiana or Ohio....everyone has guns here.
-Department store/mall Santa would get fired and sued for pulling that crap these days...how dare he tap a kid in the head with a foot.
-Ralphie's got a gun.....Ralphie's got a gun....you know, that just doesn't have the same ring to it.
-Yeah Ralphie...those icicles will kill people. Didn't you see that episode of Grey's Anatomy when Sandra Oh's character got impaled and she nearly died for the like 8th time?
-how typical midwest...sleeping with a gun. I know grown men who probably still do that.

Comments

( 1 comment — Leave a comment )
chi_mom
Dec. 31st, 2010 02:15 am (UTC)
I despise this movie! It makes want to scrape my brain out of my head with an ice pick.
( 1 comment — Leave a comment )